Terms & Conditions

1. Acceptance of Terms

By purchasing from Undefined Threads, you're entering into a binding agreement (stronger than const, more permanent than let). These terms are immutable unless we push an update to production.

2. Product Information

• All products are typeof "awesome"
• Sizes range from XS to 3XL (array indices 0-6)
• Colors may vary slightly from screen (blame your monitor's color profile)
• Each design is original and may contain easter eggs

3. Ordering & Payment

3.1 Order Processing:
Orders are processed in FIFO (First In, First Out) queue structure. Payment is processed through Stripe's secure API (PCI compliant).

3.2 Pricing:
All prices are in GBP (£). VAT is included. No hidden fees or unexpected null pointer exceptions.

3.3 Order Confirmation:
You'll receive an order confirmation faster than console.log(). If you don't see it, check your spam folder (or your code for typos).

4. Shipping & Delivery

• UK Standard: 3-5 business days (no infinite loops)
• UK Express: 1-2 business days (like using --force flag)
• International: 7-14 business days (depends on latency)
• Free Shipping: On orders over £50 (best algorithm ever)

5. Returns & Refunds

30-Day Return Policy: If you're not satisfied, return it within 30 days. Items must be unworn, unwashed, and with tags (no git reset --hard allowed).

6. Intellectual Property

All designs, code jokes, and paradoxes are property of Undefined Threads. Unauthorized reproduction will result in a SegmentationFault. We support open source but our designs are proprietary (MIT license not applicable).

7. Privacy & Data

We handle your data with care (encrypted, hashed, and salted). We don't sell your information to third parties. Your privacy is private readonly. See our Privacy Policy for the full documentation.

8. Disclaimer of Warranties

Our shirts won't fix your bugs, improve your code reviews, or make you a 10x developer. They will, however, make you look good while debugging. No warranty implied for increased productivity or decreased compile times.

9. Contact Information

const contact = {
  email: "legal@undefinedthreads.com",
  response_time: "< 24 hours",
  location: "London, UK",
  preferred_method: "email"
};